Look, I’m just as excited as anyone else for the return of OG Wolverine – I’ve been pining for the return of that hairy (literal) bastard ever since his healing factor shat the bed and he was encased in adamantium THREE YEARS AGO – but all of these mini-series and guest spots and teases have got to stop.

This could have been handled so well; Remember what you did when Joss Whedon and John Cassaday, when they decided to bring Colossus back in Astonishing X-Men? It was incredible! One issue, no tease, ENORMOUS emotional resonance. Hell, they even conspired to make a false leak of a returned Phoenix to get fans focused away from the true surprise! But with this it’s just a string of marketing promotions.

Does the return of a beloved, formerly-overexposed character demand so much exposition? Couldn’t all this have come closer to his reintroduction back in Marvel Legacy #1? According to the marketing machine, it has to be drawn out. How else can anyone justify three simultaneous mini-series that show a legion of Marvel’s characters researching the same thing?

And now it’s been released that there will be yet ANOTHER OG Wolverine mini-series coming out in September preceding the new Wolverine ongoing, the Return of Wolverine. This is some trumped-up bullshit, Marvel. Readers are spending buckets of cash trying to keep up with the return of such a popular character, and you’re taking advantage of them.

This could have been a powerful, succinct return, a return that could have boosted the numbers on any of the X-books greatly, but instead we have several superfluous minis heralding the return of an ongoing that should’ve been out last October. And don’t get me wrong: I LOVED the Hunt for Wolverine one-shot, I thought it hit just the right amount of nostalgia coupled with the right empathic stakes… But four minis? This is just overkill. This is a good story stretched out over far too many issues, diluting the emotional resonance and fervor of a returning character.

...Also, heated claws are asinine.